Miscarriage Number 10

Miscarriage Number 10

Over the past three years I have had a series of miscarriages…and I am currently recovering from my tenth, alhamdulillah. Why so many? Qadr Allah, mashaa fa’al. The only medical testing left to do is for chromosomal abnormalities; otherwise all the other tests show that there is nothing wrong with me, mashaa’Allah.

I think that Allah is ensuring I still qualify as a woman worth marrying, LOL, as He is proving at this middle stage of my life that I am perfectly fertile, mashaa’Allah. Of course, He is also giving us tests that we must respond to, react to, and formulate an attitude towards. We have been incredibly blessed with our two daughters and fully accept Allah’s Decree.

The difficult part is becoming pregnant so frequently and then being in limbo between expecting the best from Allah and thinking positively, and noticing every twinge and cramp, dreading the sight of blood or not detecting a heartbeat. It is a far bigger mental and emotional test, than physical…even though it is physically painful.

The Prophet (salla Allahu alayhi wasalam) said, upon him peace,

“The miscarried child will pester its glorious and mighty Lord for His entering its two parents into the Fire until it is told, ‘O miscarried child that pesters its Lord! Enter your father and mother into Paradise.’ Then it will drag them with its umbilical cord until it makes them enter Paradise.” (Ibn Majah and Abu Ya`la from `Ali)

And again,

“By the One in Whose hand is my soul, truly the miscarried child will certainly drag its mother with its umbilical cord to Paradise, provided one expects recompense [for sabr (patience)].” (Ibn Majah and Ahmad from Mu`adh)

And he said, upon him peace:

“Your little ones are the larvas (da`aamees) of Paradise. They will meet their parents and grab them by their garments or their hands to no end other than that Allah will enter them Paradise.” (Sahih Muslim)

Isn’t that a divine reward for your heartache?

Also, the Prophet (salla Allahu alayhi wasalam) said:

“I swear that a miscarried child of mine I send forth before me is more beloved to me than [raising] a mounted knight that survives me.” (Ibn Majah from Abu Hurayrah)

Fortitude with faith and surrender with ridaa – absolute acceptance – through losing a child, require inordinate strength of character because SABR carries huge reward and its difficulty means even more reward.

“And whoever yatasabbaru (=is racked trying to endure in patience), Allah will grant them SABR, and none was ever given a greater gift than SABR.” (narrated in the Five Books).

Hence the magnificent, tremendous ayah states:

{Verily the saabiroon will receive a reward without measure} (39:10).

Hence Umm al-Darda’ would say:

“Those that gladly accept the Divine decree have a level in Paradise that the Shuhada’ will envy them the Day of Resurrection.”

May we be the envy of the Shuhada’ – aameen!

“When Allah tests you it is never to destroy you. When He takes something out of your possession it is (only) in order to empty your hands for an even greater gift.” (Ibn Al Qayyim)
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Source : http://idealmuslimah.com/family/infertility-miscarriages-birth-control/2454-miscarriage-number-10

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